Alex wants to confront Jill about the kid climbing up the leg comment

Bethenny and Jill had a confrontation at fashion week, it did not go well. 

ACT ONE

JASON AND BETHENNY TALK

Jason comes home. This is the same day as the Jill Stuart show allegedly. Bethenny tells him that this fight with Jill which wasnt a big deal apparently was. Bethenny can’t believe Jill played the message for people. Jason: You can’t let it bother you. WORST advice ever. 

Jason wants to talk about figuring out the living situation. Jason basically says he will be proposing soon. 

LUANN AND KELLY AT PAMELA ROWLAND SHOW

Kelly and luann walk up to the tent and pose for cameras. There’s a really funny moment in the future when Luann poses for the paparazzi and the guy tells her to mix up her poses.

KELLY asks Luann want to call her; countess? Luann says just call her luann. Kelly insists on calling her countess; Kelly is such a kissass. 

Bethenny shows up. Luann amkes what Bethenny considers a dig about how normally Bethenny doesn’t come to many shows. Bethenny walks away. 

Luann poses with Rinna! Bethenny greets Rinna as well. Luann tells Bethenny while they’re posing that that wasn’t a dig, she really thinks Bethenny looks great. Bethenny said I told you I would be up front. Luann doesn’t want to do this here; Bethenny does. Luann says that Bethenny really hurt Jill’s feelings; Bethenny says how is she your good friend when Jill has been talking about how you sleep around with everyone for the past year? BURNNN! 

Bethenny calls Luann a snake. Luann calls Bethenny nasty. I mean if these two had ANY idea what was to come down the line. Kelly sits between Luann and Bethenny. Bethenny over Kelly goes “You’re talking about me and I’m right here!” a photographer approaches and they immediately smile for it. ITS SO GOOD. 

Luann says: I didn’t call you a skank darling. Bethenny says I didn’t use that word, I said snake. ...but oh just wait, because in a few years, Bethenny will call you a slut! 

Kelly leaves Bethenny and Luann to go sit with her friend Lisa who I assume is Lisa Rinna. So now Bethenny and Kelly have to switch places so Bethenny sits next to Luann so Kelly can sit next to Rinna. 

Bethenny has regrets for everything she yelled at Luann, specifically that she told Luan that Jill wasn’t her friend. 

ACT TWO

RAMONA AND AVERY AT A FASHION SHOW

More fashion shows! I wish they would go back to fashion week. 

Avery still hates Ramona. 

Kelly sits down next to Ramona. I don’t believe they’ve seen each other (or maybe they haven’t had a chance to chat) since Kelly wasn’t invited to Ramona’s house for labor day episode 2. 

Kelly: You didn’t invite me to your party, that’s not very nice! Ramona: Oh I’m so sorry! (but not meaning it) Ramona makes up some bullshit about how she didn’t want to have an altercation between Kelly and Bethenny. KEEP THIS PARTY CONVO IN MIND!! 

Kelly doesn’t buy any of it. 

After the show, Kelly says she has to go to something else after this. Kelly says she’s taking Jill to Perez Hilton’s party after this downtown. Ramona goes oh, and you didnt invite me after you just gave me crap for not inviting you?! That’s not how that works Ramona!! Kelly shouldn’t invite you BECAUSE you didn’t invite her! 

Ramona: this is my chance to bust her ass. WHATEVER she just wants to go to the party! Rmana: I said that just to tease her, and I didn’t expect her just to invite me and she did, so I thought that’s nice of her, so I should be nice and go. LIARRR you just want to go to perez hilton’s party. 

THENNNN ramona puts avery in a cab for the first time ever in her life and sends her away. Avery: I’m going by myself…! Like she can’t believe it. Avery screeches away into the night. Kelly in bite is bothered that Avery left in a cab alone. That may be the first empathetic normal thing Kelly has ever said. 

PEREZ HILTON’S PARTY 

Ew. Perez is so so gross. Perez peeks into Jill’s dress to see her boobs. 

Kelly fills in Ramona about the pamela roland show about Bethenny and Luann’s argument. Jill butts in and tells the story as if she was there. 

Jill goes on about her confrontation with Bethenny. Ramona is determined not to take sides and she wants to get better about it. 

Bethenny is serving skinnygirl cocktails at the lounge. Alex can tell Bethenny needs to talk. Alex and Bethenny have this very confidante relationship but nothing beyond that. It helps to open up to a people pleaser because they’ll give you the nurturing that you need at that moment. 

Alex brings up the thing at Ungaro about Jill saying did the boys crawl up your leg? Alex is going to take Jill out and talk to her about it. Bethenny thinks Jill made that dig because Alex seems like she’s bonding with Bethenny. 

Kelly shows up. Bethenny has her try a skinnygirl. Kelly is so weird about trying it, like she is about trying on clothes. 

Bethenny makes a joke about taking prozac and valium, and kelly says why would you do that?! Bethenny says she’s kidding. In bite, bethenny says: I don’t think Kelly is a moron… I don’t think she’s quick. 

Kelly tells Bethenny she feels bad about their drama and wants to clear the air. Bethenny thinks its genuine, refreshing, and nice. You would really believe listening to this that they would be good now. But scary island is just around the corner. 

Kelly says she will be nice to bethenny because there’s no reason not to, but she will never ever trust her. I don’t know that I could be nice to someone I couldn’t trust. 

SECRETS OF A JEWISH MOTHER COVER SHOOT

Jill’s mother looks like someone playing Judy Garland. They’re posing on the couch. Gloria is smiling and through the smile says, “Not happy, i’m not happy!!” The photographer says, “It’s just for options, we’re just getting options!” Gloria: that’s not a good option. 

It’s a lot of eye rolling and complaining. Jill is sprawled out on the couch and posing. Gloria says of the three of them Jill is too sexy. Jill’s sister tells the stylist, we should all be going to the same place. The stylist looks like she wants to murder her 

This scene annoys me so much but also I can’t look away because everyone is hamming it up SO much for the camera. It’s all performance. 

RAMONA AND BETHENNY AT DINNER

Ramona asks Bethenny for the situation with Bethenny and Jill. Bethenny says Luann interfered and that Bethenny was like, who are you? And ramona says, “Right, the empire.” She meant umpire. Ramona still refuses to take a side. 

Ramona asks Bethenny if she’s coming to the Saks event tomorrow, but Bethenny had no idea about it. I love when they say ‘a lot of people we know will be there’ but what ramona really wanted to say what, oh well its a cast event. 

Ramona says she alluded to the fact that she was goign to see Bethenny to Jill today, and Ramona says Jill will want information and will be on her like ‘white rice.’ 

ACT FOUR

JILL HOSTING SAKS EVENT

Jill is getting her HMU done for the saks event she’s hosting. Luann enters and demands a double kiss from the makeup man. Luann and Gloria talk. Luann tells her the divorce is finalized today. 

Luann: I have this sadness and finALITTTY about it. Why does she say that? 

Jill comes out and says: I don’t care if you married a count, you were born a countess. Luann: THATS THE NICEST THING YOU’VE EVER SAID TO ME!!! 

SAKS PARTY

Jill is so obnoxious in this. Ramona is shocked this event is happening, because she heard that Jill was blackballed for returning so many outfits. Ramona says that Jill’s outfit was too metallic and she could’ve looked more chic. 

Jill yells at people: This is Sak’s private club for only the best of the best clients, of course I have my own private gold key. 

Alex and Simon arrive. Luann thinks that Simon loves fashion. Simon is talking to Luann and references Mario’s countless joke. Ramona interrupts and this is when she goes BANANAS. She tells Simon that when she and Luann were planning some sort of get together, Luann didn’t want to do it because she didn’t want simon and alex to be there. 

Luann claims Ramona is lying. Alex: “You said you didnt want to invite us over?” Luann (fakely) Never… Luann is SO caught red handed. Ramona walks away and is just on her own playing with her hair and staring, her eyes are popping out of her head. It’s INSANE how out of it she is. 

Alex pulls Ramona aside and said she has to talk to Jill, about the kid thing. Alex to Ramona: You know what you can do? You can get me a drink. Ramona leaves, Alex asks Jill about the kid comment. Jill immediately says it was Luann’s story. Alex starts crying. 

Alex says sometimes Jill really pisses her off, and she makes digs are her. Here’s the thing… I truly don’t know what else Jill did to really piss her off that much. Simon and Alex always refer to confrontations as whatever event it was. Alex: “I’ve been holding it in since Ungaro!” 

Luann approaches. Alex: Who saw francois crawling up someones leg? Luann: without missing a beat… me. Luann: Well that was simple. I like you so much better than Ramona. Alex is STILL upset and says that both Jill and Luann are bugging her at this point. WHY?! I think Alex just wants prolonged drama and wants to be mad. 

Everyone sits down… 

Ramona screams I love youuu I love youuu to Jill. Jill tells Ramona that Kelly has to leave early. Ramona gets on Kelly, why do you always leave early? Why bother coming at all?

Ramona and Kelly end up on the other side of the table. Luann tells Ramona that her divorce is finalized. Ramona is very sympathetic. Luann is surprised because Ramona just came at her 5 minutes ago about the simon and alex thing. Ramona apologizes for coming at Luann. Ramona: I’d still say it all over again… 

Ramona then turns to Kelly: “Did you get your breasts redone again?” Kelly is SHOCKED. Isn’t this what everyone talks about all the time? Is it just the year this is in? 

ACT FIVE

Ramona leaves the table. Kelly says she’s so jealous. I hate when people say other people are jealous. It’s so childish. 

Kelly calls Ramona out for being inappropriate. Ramona: WHO CARES?! Alex marches over to be a part of the conversation and just watch. Kelly is pissed and storms off. 

NEXT EPISODE… 

Alli Zarin does a photoshoot. 

Jill picks up a reporter. 

The women audition designers for Brooklyn fashion week. 

Jill released an article trashing bethenny in the paper. Kelly and Bethenny fight over it. 

The awful phone call where Bethenny calls Jill in the street and Jill hangs up on her.