Gay Men Going Deeper
Gay Men Going Deeper
Michael DiIorio & Matt Landsiedel | Gay Men’s Brotherhood
Why Gay Men Struggle with Intimacy
28 minutes Posted Aug 20, 2026 at 10:00 am.
Gay Men Going Deep: Why Intimacy Feels Safer
What Is Intimacy Really Like?
Married People Say They're Not Attracted To Perfect People
What Are You Afraid Of Being Proactively Rejected For?
Geminis Have A Fear Of Intimacy
What Am I Afraid Of In A Relationship?
When Did You Start Naked With Your Girlfriend?
How to Love Yourself (No Fear of Intimacy)
How to Develop Secure Attachment
"I Get Scared in Intimacy"
The Gay Men's Brotherhood
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28:30
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Show notes
Intimacy sounds like something we all want, but being truly seen can feel terrifying.
In this episode, we talk about why fantasy often feels safer than reality, why vulnerability can feel exposing, and how the fear of rejection keeps many gay men hiding behind performance. 
We also get personal about our own struggles with being seen, how this shows up in dating. This episode is about the fear beneath the fantasy: the part of us that wants closeness, but panics when closeness asks us to be honest, visible, and emotionally available.
We talk about:
Why intimacy can feel unsafe even when we crave it
The fear of being fully seen, known, and rejected
Why fantasy feels easier than real connection
How to feel safer, more grounded, and more open to intimacy
A deep, honest conversation for gay men who want connection, but sometimes find themselves pulling away when it starts to get real.
Link: Matt’s Secure Attachment Handbook 
Today's Hosts:
Matt Landsiedel
Michael DiIorio - Take the 360° Self-Review for Gay Men
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- LEARN WITH US -
Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others.
Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame.
Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series.
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