We're back with some survival tips, so I hope you find yourself in a disastrous situation soon and get the opportunity to use them. A Desert Island Discs discussion quickly derails into talk of soap, Segways and business ideas. This episode's mistakes include:

• Wavering audio levels due to Michael microphone issues.
• Wavering attention on the topic at hand, but what's new?
• Irresponsible aggrandisement of desert island living.
• Egregious factual inaccuracies.

Put the lime in the coconut, then like us on Facebook, follow us on Twitter, rate us on iTunes, and send your questions to [email protected].