The one with all the A’s. Bonus points if you can pronounce all the names (apologies, it’s very clear that I can’t). Note to self: there is nothing less sexy than taking your dad’s hair as a gift on a blind date, and never try to out- do a bloated river god at storytelling.

Metamorphoses - Book Nine: Hercules, Horns and Havoc

Teachers would call it 'lively,' scholars would call it 'unorthodox,' and I'd call it 'honest'...I re-interpret Virgil's Aeneid with a dash of realism and all the underlying sarcastic comments necessary, reminding everyone that the classics are for all of us, always. 
(ps. in Rome, the plebs were the ordinary people. You and me. This is Classics, for Us). 

Bonus points: if you're studying Classics right now, I made sure to include all those important bits that'll definitely come up in your exams...