Age comes for every single one of us, but watching the heavy metal community navigate the inevitable slide into senior citizenship is something else entirely. From sudden health kicks, bizarre daily diets, and brutal gym routines to absolute horrors happening on venue floors during live sets, the rock world is morphing into a completely unhinged place.

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Throw in over-the-top music press hype, bizarre off-Broadway performance art, and legendary singers teaming up in the most unexpected ways, and it becomes pretty clear that nobody in this scene knows how to act normal anymore.

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