Show notes
In this episode of the Open Bedroom podcast, I interview psychologist Don Edmundson about his journey into polyamory. Don opens up about his personal experiences navigating jealousy, attachment, and the societal expectations of masculinity while building a polyamorous family with two partners and children. We discuss how he overcame ingrained beliefs about control, the importance of open communication, and how polyamory can foster trust and personal growth. Our conversation also explores research on relationship satisfaction and the evolving acceptance of ethical non-monogamy, offering practical insights for anyone interested in non-traditional relationships.Don Edmondson is a tenured professor, and the Director of the Center for Behavioral Cardiovascular Health at Columbia University Medical Center. He is also a polyamorous man living with his 2 partners and their 2 kids. He launched PolyamPsychologist in 2025, to communicate the revolutionary potential of polyamory for society.Don’s Polyamory Origin Story (00:02:16) Don shares his background, upbringing, and initial exposure to non-monogamy, including his Southern Baptist roots and early relationships.Transition to Polyamory & Jealousy (00:05:20) Don explains the shift from hierarchical non-monogamy to polyamory, struggles with jealousy, and the journey toward compassion.Building a Polyamorous Family (00:07:48) Don shares how his family expanded to include Saga and their children, forming a supportive household and evolving family dynamics.Therapy, Exposure, and Healing (00:14:14) Don discusses using therapy and exposure techniques to overcome jealousy, build trust, and experience compersion.Gendered Advice for Polyamory (00:18:24) Don explains how advice for polyamory differs for men due to patriarchal conditioning, and discusses attachment theory and secure relationships.Deconstructing Patriarchy for Men (00:24:54) Jen asks how men can question and unlearn patriarchal beliefs about control in relationships; Don shares his personal growth through feminist friendship and recommended resources.Men, Polyamory, and Social Media (00:30:39) Jen asks about Don’s TikTok series on men and polyamory; Don explains his motivation, themes, and addresses issues like vulnerability and manipulation.Research on Polyamory vs. Monogamy (00:37:14) Jen asks about scientific research comparing monogamy and polyamory; Don summarizes findings on satisfaction, trust, sexual fulfillment, and the growth of ethical non-monogamy.Podcast Wrap-Up and Resources (00:45:17) Jen and Don share where to find more resources, social media links, and thank listeners.Connect with Don:InstagramTikTokOther resources mentioned:alexalberto.com and quiltedpress.com
