If you have ever wondered:
💭 “Why do I feel so guilty every time I do something for myself?”
💭 “Why does leaving my child feel like leaving a part of me behind?”
💭 “How do I stop my childhood pain from running my parenting?”
– this episode is for you.
In this brave and deeply personal episode, Tess and Layne sit in the hot seat with therapist Lael Stone for a live mini therapy session that unpacks the childhood stories shaping their relationship to self-care, separation, and motherhood.
Tess reveals her fear of missing out on moments with Benji and traces it back to being three years old, shuttled between homes after her parents’ divorce. She realises the separation anxiety she feels at daycare drop-off is not the adult leaving. It is her inner child reliving the pain of being left behind. Layne shares the story of losing her adoptive mother at seven, being adopted at birth after conception through date rape, and how the ocean became the mother love she never had.
Lael guides them through the imprints they received around self-care, boundaries, and rest, showing how the martyr story and the “you’re lazy if you stop” narrative are passed down through generations. She offers a powerful reframe: you do not have to choose between being a present mother and meeting your own needs. Healing the younger parts of yourself is what allows the integrated adult to show up. And when you complete your story, your children do not have to carry it.
You will learn:
How childhood imprints around self-care create hidden blocks to rest and boundaries in adulthood
Why separation anxiety in parenting often has roots in your own childhood experiences
The three-step process for healing: identify the story, feel it, and offer compassion to your younger self
Why completing your own healing story frees your children from carrying wounds that were never theirs
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Disclaimer
The A Wake Up Call podcast is created for general informational, educational, and inspirational purposes only. The stories, tools, and insights shared are designed to support your wellbeing journey - not to replace professional medical, psychological, or therapeutic advice. In fact, we believe therapy is non-negotiable in life.
If you’re experiencing a medical or mental health condition, please seek guidance from a qualified healthcare professional. Never ignore or delay seeking professional advice because of something you’ve heard on this podcast.
Your wellbeing matters. Take care of yourself, stay curious, and remember the real wake-up call is listening to what your body and mind are trying to tell you.
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