Here’s the scenario; You’re writer/director Roger Avary. It’s 1995. In the last two years, you’ve won a Best Original Screenplay oscar (Pulp Fiction) and had a successful directorial debut (Killing Zoe). For your next project, you’ll be working with Rutger Hauer (Blade Runner) on a modern reboot of Frankenstein he’s producing and starring in. Ron Perlman (The City of Lost Children, Hellboy) and Wil Wheaton (Star Trek: TNG) are also attached. What could go wrong? Just about everything. Awful dialogue, Year 8 pseudo-philosophy, inexplicable giant floating eyeballs and 40 goddamn minutes spent in a white void. There were severe ‘creative differences’ on set, and it shows. A waste of a Ron Jeremy cameo (Porn). Reviewers: James Ferris, Andrew Cherry, Harry Brimage Soundboard: Lisa Dib Show Notes: <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mr._Stitch">Mr. Stitch - Wikipedia</a> <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0113864/">Mr. Stitch - IMDB</a> <a href= "http://www.ew.com/article/1996/05/10/mr-stitch-plagued-creative-differences"> Review - Entertainment Weekly</a> <a href= "http://wilwheaton.typepad.com/wwdnbackup/2009/02/the-one-about-that-time-i-worked-in-a-movie-with-ron-jeremy-yes-that-ron-jeremy.html"> Wil Wheaton’s Blog about Ron Jeremy</a>

306 - Rag and Bone

We're all familiar with the idea of a pilot episode, the one-off test run of a series to see whether or not it could ever work as a television show. But what happens to the shows that never make it past that stage? Usually they're cast aside and disappear from the public eye forever, doomed to fade into obscurity.

But Melbourne comedy troupe The Consumption say "No more!" We are reaching deep into the bowels of television history to bring you back hot, steaming piles of TV's many bizarre miscarriages. All while mixing the most disgusting metaphors possible.

We'll seek out and expose ourselves to the worst television pilots ever made so you don't have to. Each episode will see us dissect and discuss another horrible failed pilot for our amusement. Join us in our schadenfreude as we talk about wrestlers solving crimes, invisible monsters, kung-fu ravers, talking dogs solving crimes, teleporting stand-up comedians, cross dressing misogynists, magicians solving crimes and a whole bunch of other terrible ideas, most of which involve crimes being solved.

Welcome to Failure to Launch! The only TV podcast about shows that don't exist.